{i’m a full time job}

(Disclaimer...I was too lazy to do a final proofread on this post.  I'll tend to that later.)

I know, I know.  You never write, you never call. Life gets in the way of getting everything done that we want to and for me one of those things is keeping up on my blog.  But, I’m here now so grab a cup of coffee and sit with me for awhile. I’ve been busy...busy with kids, busy at home, busy at the gym, busy with classes, busy recovering, busy trying to keep my body healthy and strong to survive the treatments wreaking havoc on my body.  That last one, keeping my body healthy and strong I am finding is a full-time job.  It takes about a week following a treatment to feel like myself again, to feel “normal”. By that I mean no harsh side effects...nausea, lack of appetite, constipation (A fantastic side effect of the chemo drugs. I hesitated to add that, but I don’t think anybody will be surprised that I do indeed have bowel movements), dehydration, fatigue, and as the treatments go on sadness and a general feeling of a big F-you to the universe. So that first week following a treatment I’m not a joy to be around.  I kind of try to keep to myself and remind myself that as my physical state starts to improve, my emotional and mental state follows closely behind.  But, even though I feel really good about a week out from a treatment I know my body is still reeling from have chemo drugs, anti-nausea, antacids, and white-blood cell boosting drugs pumped into my body.  All of that damages and causes stress to the body that doesn’t just go away because I’m feeling better.  It takes awhile for the body to heal itself and it can take weeks or months for that to happen, and I am working to do all I can to help my body out.  

Taking care of me is a full-time job.  In order for my body to heal I have to put the right stuff into it.  I believe in the healing power of food, appropriate supplements, and not just using drugs or medication.  There is a difference between being healthy and not being sick. I want to be healthy.  I want to start at my cells and make them stronger. I want my body to have the best care as nature intended to repair itself and protect itself, repair and protect itself from the damaging effects of the treatments I am having to give me the best chances of a longer life than I might not have otherwise.  I’m not happy about any of my treatments, thankful for the availability of my treatment plan, but not happy about them.  The immediate side effects, continuing side effects I may be living with for the next five years, and the lasting-effects, the effects that I may face down the road because of the damaging effects of these life-saving/prolonging treatments. I have to remind myself to not worry about those and focus on today, one day at a time because, duh, you only get one day at a time and your emotional and mental state can’t really handle the burden of 3,650-5,475 days at a time.  People have been telling me to not worry about all of that yet, just take it as it comes.  I appreciate these words, I really do. But, a person can’t understand how hard that can be unless you are in the middle of it.  But, I keep trying and life will continue on as it usually does, somedays I fail and sometimes I succeed, and somewhere on the other side I’m sure a majority of the things I am concerned about and worry about will never come to be.  Years ago my grandma shared something she read, “98% of the things we worry about never come to be.” Since she shared that I have generally not been a worrier, until now. Now I worry about everything that has to do with my health and my body. I guess maybe cancer will do that to a person.

So the purpose of this post is actually to just give a list of what I am doing for my body.  Much of this is based on recommendations from the naturopath at my oncologist’s office and my personal naturopath, and my own research and choosing. The supplements I have chose to do on my own have been okayed by both naturopaths. Some of these supplements are for general health, others are to help manage side effects from chemo, some I was taking before, some I should have been taking, but always forgot.  Now I don’t, I’m a freaking supplement and vitamin whore. 

Supplements and Vitamins

My morning "sludge":

In a pint mason jar I combine the following:

• About 1/2 c. OJ

• 1 T. PuraDyme Liyf Essentials - Whole food amino acid complex. Provides all essential and non-essential amino acids and high in all Tocotrienols and Tocopherols, proven to suppress cancer and tumors

• 15 g (3 3/4 t.) Jarrow Formulas L-Glutamine - 15g 2x/day.  Helps reduce the risk of chemo and radiation induced neuropathy and to help with mouth sores due to the chemo drug Taxotere. Since I have added this to my daily supplement regimen I have had little issue with neuropathy or mouth sores.

• 3/4 t. PuraDyme LiyfBiotic Probiotic - 36 billion CFU - The chemo drugs are harsh on the stomach and intestinal track due to it's job to kill fast growing cells.  A quality probiotic can help alleviate the stress put on the digestive system. This probiotic is expensive at $140 for the 8 oz. container, but it actually lasts a long time and is worth it to me. I also use this in making my own coconut yogurt.  I will try to post that recipe at the end of this blog post or in another post with some basic smoothie and juicing recipes that I use.

• 1 t. PuraDyme PuraCleanse - Cleansing, strengthening, and renewing for the intestinal tract.  I was taking this before I started treatment.  Mostly to aide in elimination and detoxifying my body.  Many diseases originate in the colon, healthy "moving" is necessary for flushing toxins from the body. I was taking 2t/day, but the licorice root in this cleanse can interfere with the effectiveness of one of the chemo drugs.  A little is okay so I was given the okay to continue using just 1 t./day.  This is very important the week after a treatment when constipation is usually an issue. 

• 1 1/4 t. Nordic Naturals Omega-3 Purified Fish Oil - This is one of those supplements that I knew I should always take, but failed to make it a habit.  I have been taking it nearly every single day since before I started chemo and I can definitely tell a difference in my joints.  My knee and pain across the back of my pelvis is very minimal now.  I thank the anti-inflammatory benefits of fish oil.  I have found that I have to shake up the first four supplements with the OJ first before mixing in the fish oil or the glutamine and probiotic powder clumps up.  This is a brand highly recommended my my oncology naturopath, it's a high quality brand. 

Additional Supplements and Vitamins

• 2000mg/3x/day Host Defense Turkey Tail - Organic Mushroom supplement for immune support.  A promising study has shown that Turkey Tail Mushrooms improves the immune system of breast cancer patients.  I am a firm believer in mushroom supplements, especially those by this company.  My personal naturopath said she is positive the cure for cancer will be found in mushrooms.  Could be, but all I know is my white blood cell count has remained at normal levels while taking this supplement during chemo when they should be taking a beating. I have also avoided catching any nasty cold and flu bugs while those around me have...and I didn't get a flu shot. Other promising mushroom supplements to protect against cancer are Maitake and Reishe. I plan to switch to Reishe before I start radiation.  Reishe has been shown to counter the harmful effects that radiation has on normal, healthy cells. Common button mushrooms and shitake are also cancer-fighting mushrooms.  I try to sauté and eat 4-5 button mushrooms most days for their cancer-fighting properties. A little olive oil, some garlic and shallots and I have a quick cancer fighting boost in my day.  This Turkey Tail supplement was recommended by the oncology clinic's naturopath.  She said any of them would be good, Turkey Tail just has the most research behind it. My regular naturopath talked to me about this brand of supplements in the past, too.  At her recommendation, after treatment I will be switching to a mushroom blend supplement and about half the dose.
• 5000IU Vital Nutients Vitamin D3. 
• 12.5mg Iodoral High Potency Iodine/Potassium Iodide
• 1000mg Vitamin C - pills or Emergen-C packet
• Bluebonnet Whole Food Based Multivitamin and Multimineral
• 20mg Melatonin

Dietary Changes

In addition to all my supplements I have made diet changes, as well.  I've always tried to eat and do well for my body, but there are some things that I can do or strive to do better to reduce my risk of recurrence even more.  Lord knows, I don't want to do this crap again. Of course, nobody is perfect and I will slip sometimes, but the 80-85% rule that I used to follow (eat on track 80-85% of the time) is now hopefully 90-95% of the time.  The main goals of my dietary changes are to flood my body with cancer fighting foods and to not increase estrogen in my body.

• Alcohol-I'm shooting for no more than 1-2 drinks/week, none if I have no reason to, those reasons for me to have a drink are date nights with my hubby or gathering with friends.  I miss my Chardonnay. :-( But, the breast cancer I had was estrogen+.  This means that estrogen fueled the cancer cells.  Alcohol increases the levels of estrogen in the body, therefore providing more fuel for the cancer cells that could be in my body.  This is a message I got last night from my naturopath, who has been my fountain of information, "What I found on the booze situation...all studies that show an increase in breast cancer were in obese patients. Obese patients store estrogen in their fat and have probs with liver metabolization. I found one great article that stated 'if patient is healthy otherwise, that moderate alcohol does NOT increase risk of recurrence', they stated that 3-4 drinks per week (seperated by time and days) were generally regarded as safe. My take...if you have a drink every other or every 3rd day you will be safe."
• Limited/no dairy (especially high fat) and commercially grown meat.  Hormones given to animals can result in increased levels of estrogen in the body. If I have dairy I make sure it is from cows not treated with hormones or antibiotics.  I use almond milk and coconut milk in recipes, sauces and smoothies or protein shakes.  I have tried almond cheese, it was okay, I would probably buy it again, but not often.  If I want a treat of some real cheese I try to buy organic.
• Low-fat diet, primarily low in animal fats (dairy and animal fats) - high fat diets, especially animal fats, increase the levels of estrogen in the blood. Good fats are great in the diet: olive oil, avocados, cold-water wild caught fish, etc.
• No sugar- You've heard my rant before, SUGAR FEEDS CANCER! This is what I wanted to scream when the nurse walked around the room yesterday with a bag of cookies for everybody.  I politely declined. 
• No red meat for three months. It can raise estrogen in the body so I am just giving my body a cleansing break. I do have to do more research into grass-fed beef to see if there is any risk...because we have 3/4 of a grass-fed cow in or freezers.  The processor that we get our grass-fed beef from doesn't use antibiotics, so this is a huge plus in my/our diet...I have slipped on this from time to time simply out of convenience.  
• No processed or cured meats-Nitrates, nitrites, chemicals...you get it.
• No grilled meats. Cooking meat at high temperatures can create substances that can increase risk of cancer.  Even baking chicken at 350 can cause these cancer causing substances.  Here is an interesting article on cooking meats. 
• Lots of cruciferous veggies-Broccoli, cabbage, brussels sprouts, cauliflower, just to name a few.   So many cancer fighting properties in this family of veggies. 
• Paleo-ish Diet/Plant-based-ish diet - Here is where I am torn.  I'm not sure if I have been eating mostly Paleo (no grains, dairy, legumes) for so long that I just feel it is right, but I am having a hard time switching to a plant-based diet that I see highly recommended in almost all my reading.  I have extensively googled "breast cancer diet reduce recurrence" or something like that and all I get are search results for plant-based diet and the Mediterranean Diet.  To get results that include info on the Paleo diet for cancer risk reduction I have to include Paleo in my search. I am greatly torn because after trying just a plant based diet I find that a) I don't have a clue how to cook plant-based meals and soy is used heavily, b) there is no way I can get enough protein on a plant-based diet to support how I workout, and c) my body feels so much better eating primarily Paleo.  So which do I choose? I have no idea so I'm doing some of both.  I have been making brown rice with some dinners and eating some oatmeal and quinoa for breakfast (I have really missed oatmeal). I am going for quality of meat, local grass-fed beef, organic or very natural chicken, and no cured meats and buying as many organic veggies as the pocket book will allow.  Really as much organic food as the pocket book will allow. I try to buy produce organically off this list.  This gives a list of the Dirty Dozen+ veggies with the highest pesticide residue and the Clean Fifteen, the 15 with the lowest residue.  They do also state that eating a diet high in fruits and vegetables is more beneficial than the exposure to pesticides. The sad part about eating like this is it is expensive.  It would be FAR cheaper to just rely on the recommended prescription drugs to prevent cancer than to put good food into my body to help prevent cancer also.  
• At least one quart of organic, decaf greet tea daily.  I try to get up every morning and remember to brew a mason jar of green tea and drink it through out the day. 
• Juicing-I'm trying to juice at least three days per week to get a powerful veggie punch in a 16 oz glass of juice.  I can get at least 12 servings of fruits and vegetables in a 16 ounce glass.  I also eat other fruits and veggies whole for the fiber.  I generally juice kale, collard greens, parsley, cilantro, celery, mint, green cabbage, cucumbers, lemon, apples, and ginger in my daily drink.  Every now and then I will throw in a carrot or two. I have tried arugula but didn't like the bitter taste and you get very little juice from a large quantity of arugula.  I have also tried dandelion greens (I had no idea you could buy these at Super 1), but didn't care for the bitter taste.  I am taking a warning to heart from my brother, never juice radishes.  You can't add enough other juiced veggies to cut the harsh radish taste. I feel so healthy every time I juice up a big glass of fresh fruits and veggies.  I swear I can feel the juice combatting cancer cells in my body as I drink it. :) 

Working Out

If you know me or have read my blog (or even the title of my blog) you know I'm an avid worker outer. I've been doing my best to keep up my gym regimen while going through chemo.  My goal was to not gain a lot of weight or lose much muscle. I'm doing pretty well in both of those.  Tony thinks I have possibly put on a tiny bit of muscle in my upper body and my weight is only up 1-3 pounds depending where I am in the chemo treatment/recovery cycle. I continue to CrossFit, trying to get in four days per week, sometimes I lower my weights, sometimes I try to do the Rx weight and just battle through.  Our CrossFit workouts have been getting harder, not the weightlifting as much, but our metcons (metabolic conditioning) have kicked my butt the past couple rounds.  My entire body fatigues almost right away and this last round has added nausea, dizziness and great shortness of breath to my workouts.  I have slowed WAY down, but I still go and move for the whole class.  Somedays I do okay, somedays the workout of the day (WOD) totally wins.  Last week, three days after my fourth treatment I went to the gym and worked out.  It. Was. Hard.  I finished, sat down agains the back wall, put my head in my hands and cried. I tried to be tough that day, but the WOD beat me. But, I did walk in the door that day and that is a win.  Since I started treatment I have probably only missed 4 or 5 workouts that I would have normally gone to and I have only missed one day of coaching my classes.  My gym time and seeing my friends at the gym is a huge part of making it through chemo fairly unscathed. I'm even considering registering for the CrossFit Open's scaled division this year.  We'll see, I have a couple weeks to decide.  

I'm going to try to run a half-marathon in the fall and have put together a Kick Cancer's Ass Race Series starting with the Race for the Cure 5K in Helena the weekend after my birthday.  I was hoping to be done with radiation by then, but won't quite make it.  It doesn't mean I can't still give cancer the middle finger with my first race of the year.  A half is going to be a lofty goal that will be determined by the health of my knee, tendonitis might cap me at a 10K, but I'm going to give it a try and see what happens.

I am aching to jump on my mountain bike and start riding.  I'm about ready to toss my bike in my car and drive to Arizona or some place that will allow me to ride, it would do wonders for my soul right now.

Well, I have been slowly putting this post together for many weeks so I am going to wrap it up and get this lengthy baby posted.  

BUT WAIT!

Let me also take a minute here to thank EVERYBODY who has sent private messages (sorry, I'm way behind on replying to them!), posts on Facebook, texts, emails or called to see how I am doing. EVERYBODY who has run into me and given me a hug, a word of encouragement or simply says, "I have no words except cancer sucks". EVERYBODY who has delivered our family a delicious meal when I haven't felt well or am bogged down with fatigue.  EVERYBODY who has sent me cards or care packages with amazing gifts for good healing, a good laugh, or a warm head (and a special thank you to my aunt who sent me great socks for every chemo day that give chemo the middle finger. Please be sure to watch Facebook for my socks on March 6th.  You won't want to miss them!)  EVERYBODY who has said prayers or sent good thoughts out into the universe or me and my family. I/we APPRECIATE every single one of you.  Thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing your love and support.  I can't imagine going through this crap alone and without the support that I have. I'm sending huge hugs and buckets of love to all of you!! Muah!!

Another special thanks to my amazing dad who has taken the week off from work following each of my treatments to help with the kids and cook us meals, while carrying a heavy heart watching is little girl go through cancer crap again.  A thank you to my kids who celebrate with me having four weeks left until my last treatment, who rub my head to feel the little bit of hair that has continued to grow, to check on me when I'm not feeling well after treatment, who give me a hug or some love out of the blue, and for having friends and teachers/coaches that continually offer me support and have generously given me sweet gifts of encouragement.  And to my dear husband who stands by my side, holds me when I need it most, loves me unconditionally, takes care of me, makes sacrifices for me, and understands the things I struggle with the most. Without these people in my life, I couldn't do this. I love you!! xoxoxo

"She Stood In The Storm, & When The Wind Did Not Blow Her Way, She Adjusted Her Sails"